It is going to be 87 F degrees today, so I will offer a contrast that may help me accept the discomfort.
Although I do not recommend taking on huge cleaning projects in 80+ degree weather, I have been anxious to set up my office, which I ceded to my son two years ago. I don’t know about y’all, but I find cleaning like following Ariadne’s thread. One thing leads to twenty others that should be done as well. In order to move my desk out of the master bedroom, I needed to rearrange the bed and dresser in my son’s room, which made my husband look covetously at the dresser, which meant cleaning out our closet, finally packing away the winter clothes, bagging the too-small clothes that we refuse to save in hope, laundering the (without hyperbole) twenty-something unmatched socks that were under aforementioned son’s bed and dresser, and a thorough scouring of both bedrooms. Augean stables? Definitely a bit cleaner, but just as big a job.
Thankfully, although my head still spins when I pick something off the floor, or stand up too fast, the vertigo is not interfering overmuch these days. My hay fever is epic, so colleagues at the day job stay several feet from me, disbelieving my protests that I’m not contagious.
I’ve given up on PT, sadly, but the bright side of the coin is that I’m usually writing during the time I would have been at PT. I am still meditating and still doing baby yoga. The biggest change is the buzz of writing, constantly on a sub-channel of my brain. It’s been such a long time since I’ve felt that, I am fiercely joyous. I have stopped playing computer games, I have pared my “must-see” TV down to a minimum, and I keep thinking about characters and plots during the boring parts of day job meetings.
So far, it is all disorganized: snippets of ideas, things to look into, possible character backgrounds. I get discouraged, to be honest, but I have to remind myself to look back at the wasteland of the last few years, and see the change. When I’m not writing, I want to write. I don’t care that most of it will be subsumed into back story and never see the light of day. I still want to take my muse out for a welcome home dinner.
Thank you to all my ROW80 friends for sticking with me. Please join me in visiting and encouraging them here.